Query

[Yvonne Belisle]

Why is it that lies about ones feelings are prefered rather than truth? When one states how they truely feel in this word they are critisized for it. WHY???????????????????????????????

[loopy]

Because the truth can be much uglier, or more hurtful, or more awkward than a lie, and most people just want to live in Happy-go-fluffy Land.

[Xander67]

yes. but you know what, I would rather have the truth..at least if i know the truth, I wont make a fool out of myself and i will be able to make intelligent decisions and not be manipulated...or used....hmmm very good question Yvonne..:)

[Myst]

It depends on the person. Unfortunately it is true that some people would rather live in happy land then know the truth.

I wonder about that too sometimes Yvonne. For me, I'm one of those people who's likely to just say what I think and not hide it in layers of apologies or smiles etc. and some people just can't handle it. I know I'd prefer the truth to a lie any day.

Sometimes I think people are just raised or grow to think that it's easier to keep people happy or be told something that will make you happy then face the truth.

[Xander67]

oh thank you for that insight Myst Thank you!
my parents always told me to tell the truth....
and if I have children some day, I will teach them the same...

[witchywench]

Lies are pointless and hard work, think of all the extra lies you need to reinforce the first!

Waste of perfectly good energy.

I prefer honesty no matter what, at least you know where you stand in a situation and you will never compromise yourself!

Just wish the rest of the world worked this way!:thumbsup:

[GoddessofWisdom]

Originally posted by Yvonne Thomas
Why is it that lies about ones feelings are prefered rather than truth? When one states how they truely feel in this word they are critisized for it. WHY???????????????????????????????

OK hun what happened??????????


Sit down, take a deep breath and relax.

When you feel ok then feel free to let us know what happened!

[Adrenaline Junkie]

I would prefer the truth to lies anyday. Even if the truth is way uglier. Lies hurt people more than the truth, even if the truth is way bad.

[Yvonne Belisle]

If I were to say what happened I'd only have it thrown in my face again but this time on the main boards.

[Swanspirit]

some people are so invested in having people believe what they want them to believe ........that if an occasion arises that someone doesnt ........then they are criticised........
EXAMPLE .....I had some online friends ....... one was having a really difficult time with something that only pertained to herself and her feelings about her self........She came to me with it AFTER I told her it was ok if she didnt open up...... and that she would know when she was ready if ever to talk ....otherwise I still loved her as a friend ( and still do)
I had a LONG talk with my friend and it turned out she thought she was "going crazy" when in actuality she was was experiencing something very common ........ that I was able to help her with .......SHE really did the work .....had the insight and brought herself out of it .........
BUT she had another friend .....online.....that got MAD at her for letting ME help her instead of her .......told her off for not "opening up to HER" and letting HER "solve her problems" .........
Well it was very obvious to both of us by that time that the other person wasnt HAPPY that the friend felt better ..... it was ALL ABOUT the one who wanted to be seen as the "healer".......some healer ...... geting mad at someone for feeling better about themselves
So sometimes ....... it isnt about YOU at all it is all about them ..........
hope this helps
Swannie

[Mairwen]

Because the TRUTH HURTS and people would rather live in DENIAL and pretend to be HAPPY all the time that all is right in the world, when it's NOT and never will be. Ignorance is bliss ~ NOT!

[Mariposa De La Luna]

Originally posted by Mairwen
Because the TRUTH HURTS and people would rather live in DENIAL and pretend to be HAPPY all the time that all is right in the world, when it's NOT and never will be. Ignorance is bliss ~ NOT!

I agree Mairwen.

Most people don't want to have to deal with the truth, its easier that way.

[Lavender]

I think no matter how much the truth hurts, it's still better than living in a lie. Personally, I would rather be hurt by the truth & get over it that live in a lie. What a waste of time!

[Mythrel]

I prefer to hear the truth, but most people just can't handle it...it happens...
Mythrel

[Swanspirit]

"""I think no matter how much the truth hurts, it's still better than
living in a lie. Personally, I would rather be hurt by the truth & get
over it that live in a lie. What a waste of time!"""

I could NOT agree with you more.........
I have always said a TRUE friend is someone who doesnt always tell you what you want to hear..........but in reality some people dont value that......and would rather believe outright LIES than have to face the truth ......
I have been amazed at the lengths to which some people will go to avoid the truth.....
and the absolute CONSCIOUS evil and harm that someone would do to preserve a lie...... and to so -called friends.........
Love and light
Swannie

[Mairwen]

I'd rather someone hurt me by telling me the truth today than waiting until three years from now and saying, "Oh by the way ..." That just does't work for me.

[Lavender]

The sad thing is when being truthful breaks up a friendship. If the friendship is strong, it will withstand the set-back. Sometimes a person may not want to hear the truth. They want you to confirm that their decision was the best. It may not be. Or you may not agree with it. It doesn't mean that you care for them any less.