How to handle mean christians ???

[zhowlingwolf]

I went to my wife's cousins B-day party and her Uncle ( who is a devoted Baptist ), heard I am Pagan. He got on his soap box so that 15 or so people heard him, stating " I'm damning myself, my wife and children straight to hell ". He was saying this in front of my wife and children !!! I felt so angry and hurt from this ignorance. I had a lump in my throat. All I could say was unfortunately this attitude makes America a little less than it could be . I politely excused myself and left. I did'nt want to be a bad example to my children or a poor representive of Paganism.
Did I do the right thing ???
Blessed Be !!! zhowlingwolf

[Shadowulfe]

I think you did IMO of course....i mean, they are gonna say what they want regardless...just ignore the person.

Brightest Blessings,
Shadowulfe

[zhowlingwolf]

Thank you for your reply !!!
It's hard to ignore the wifes family though.
I'm going to have to deal with this at one point or another.
BB !!! zhowlingwolf

[clef0628]

You did the right thing. But, because you are going to have to deal with him again. I would ask your wife if she knows any good ways to talk to her Uncle about it. Or, would it be possibile for her to talk to her Uncle. He may be willing to listen to your wife more because he's her Uncle.

[zhowlingwolf]

P.S. Does anyone know what to say about A King named Saul (???) that went crazy when he went to see a witch ( LoL )???

[Shadowulfe]

thats very true. but for now figure out exactly how to reslove the matter with the least amount of conflict possible.

anyway hope it helps,
Shadowulfe

[Shadowulfe]

Originally posted by zhowlingwolf
P.S. Does anyone know what to say about A King named Saul (???) that went crazy when he went to see a witch ( LoL )???

The name is familiar but i dont remember why...let me do some research to try and figure it out...

Bible Maybe??

brightest blessings,
Shadowulfe

[zhowlingwolf]

Thats a great idea Clef0628 !!!
I will do that , however my wife is still mad at him . Apparently he kept speaking about this when I left, and that Jerry Falwell is right and because of people like me our country is an abomination in the eyes of God. He thinks my wife is going to hell cause she is Catholic, and she feels I need to stick up fpr myself.
When my daughter asked me why I let him get away with this, all I could say was " If it dont apply let it fly " *smile, wink*.

[zhowlingwolf]

Hi andBlessings shadowulfe !!!
He did mention that it was in the Bible !!!
Thank you for caring !!!
BB zhowlingwolf

[Myst]

First, knowing this man is a devoted Baptist, why did he find out you were Pagan? Second, if I were you I would've just passed it off as ignorance. Third, the guy thinks your wife is going to hell because she's Catholic, and my guess is you aren't the only one in the family who thinks he's a fanatic. So I wouldn't worry about that too much. Fourth, someone like that won't ever listen to you or your beliefs and you'll be wasting your time trying. If I were you I'd just stay away from him - obviously he's too ignorant and negative to be any positive force in your family's life. Fifth, hey maybe you are a witch and that's why ol' uncle went kookoo ;)

[zhowlingwolf]

Greetings Mist !!!
He found out about me cause my wife told her regretably aunt.
I would love to avoid him but my wife is in business with the Aunt , you are making perfect sense !!!
Maybe he is a lot like Saul ( LoL ).

[Myst]

oh in that case

everytime you see him cross your eyes and wave your hands around and say something stupid like "oogly boogly gobbledy gook!", yell the last part of the sentence. Then laugh about how silly your uncle is with your wife and any other family later :)

[zhowlingwolf]

You have the best sense of humor !!!
I will do that !!! If nothing else you reminded me of keeping a sense of humor about this !!! Thank you !!!
May the light be your guide and the darkness be your comfort !!!
BB zhowlingwolf

[Myst]

:D

[zhowlingwolf]

A friend called me on my cell and told me " Dont try to teach a pig to sing, it wastes your time and makes the pig angry " ( LoL )
BB zhowlingwolf

[Lavender]

I completely agree with Myst. You can't explain things to people like that. They won't listen & you're wasting your breath. If you can't say anything rude, just smile and thank them for their concern & walk away. That leaves them standing there with their jaws still flapping & looking very foolish.

[zhowlingwolf]

Just want to say I'm grateful for all the replies it means a lot !!!
I have to go to work ( @ the hospital ) now, I'll be back after my shift !!!
Blessed Be !!! zhowlingwolf

[zhowlingwolf]

Just saw your reply come up Wild child , and people like yourself makes me proud to be a Pagan !!!
May the God/dess Bless You Always !!! zhowlingwolf

[Avena]

Originally posted by zhowlingwolf
P.S. Does anyone know what to say about A King named Saul (???) that went crazy when he went to see a witch ( LoL )???

Isn't Saul the same guy who later became known as Paul (or something similar), one of Jesus' followers? Not sure of course... :rolleyes:

[bansidhe]

okies zhowlingwolf, this is what i know about saul.
the israelites asked for a king when samuel was getting on a bit. although samuel told the people that it was a bad idea, they insisted and eventually got their way. the man chosen was saul, the son of a wealthy and influential man, kish. saul was a head taller and handsomer than anyone else in israel, a good candidate as far as the people were concerned. kish had lost his donkeys and saul was sent to find them. he couldnt find them anywhere til he heard that samuel was in town and decided to go and ask him. samuel saw saul and anointed him as king, as this was what god had prewarned him to do. saul was a good king and did very well in wars, kicking a lot of foreign nasty's bottoms. however, after the israelite victory over the amalekites, saul did not keep his side of the deal, he spared the life of the amalekite king and didnt sacrifice the best loot to god. this made god a bit angry and he told samuel that he regretted what he had done. samuel went to saul and had it out with him. saul realised that he had screwed up. saul then got tangled up with david (of david and goliath fame). he made things even worse and was actually really mean to david. after samuel had died, the philistines decided that they wanted to have israel, so they gathered up their army. saul was terrified cos he knew he wouldnt win without god's help. so he went to see what the bible calls a 'medium' which was a very big no-no. he was disguised and eventually got the medium to raise the shade of samuel. samuel was angry, and told saul so. saul explained to him his problem, expecting help. samuel basically told him what he had already told him - that saul had majorly screwed up and that god was going to hand over the kingdom to david (who saul still didnt really get on with) and that the philistines were going to win tomorrow. furthermore, saul and all of his sons were going to die. the ,edium was good to saul (even tho he had kicked all fortune tellers and mediums outta israel), making hjim bread and stuf so he would be strong enough to journey.
wow, thats long. thats all i know, i hope it will help ya! :) if you want more detail, im pretty sure its all in 1 samuel, and the medium bit would be very near the end. :) good luck with the rellies. do what i do, even if they disown ya, kill them with kindness!
take care and brightest blessings,
bans. :bubbles:

[bansidhe]

thats the other saul avena. gets confusing! :)
take care and brightest blessings,
bans. :bubbles:

[Ball-Bhreac Ròn]

There were TWO Sauls? Yeesh! :p

[bansidhe]

yup, king saul that was a real pain to david (old testament) and saul that was a real pain to christians and then became paul and a devoted christian (new testament). there might be more, im not sure!
take care and brightest blessings,
bans. :bubbles:

[Methanespirit]

Zhowligwolf: it is not uncommon for the denomination that you mentioned to condemn others who do not agree with their ideas. They are the only group that I (and others as well) have been unwelcomed to any of their meetings years ago, by being directly told that my (our) presence wasn't needed! What was it that Jesus said about such things?: John 16:2-3; " They will make you outcasts from their synagogues (or churches), but an hour is coming for everyone who kills you (physically or spiritually) to think that he is offering a service to God (3) And these things they will do because they have not known the Father or Me." And, Yes, there is an account about King Saul. You can read it in I Samuel 28:3-25.

[zhowlingwolf]

Thank you Methanespirit and Bansidhe both for all this info!!!
This is a Blessing since the best way( I was taught anyway) to deal with ignoance is knowledge. now I'll have something to work with !!!Ben Franklin once said " We are all born ignorant, but it takes a lot of work to stay stupid " ( LoL ). I am going to look up those passages and learn what I can and I'll pass along whatever I can !!!
Blessed Be Always !!! zhowlingwolf

[Da Witch]

Originally posted by Wildchild
I completely agree with Myst. You can't explain things to people like that. They won't listen & you're wasting your breath. If you can't say anything rude, just smile and thank them for their concern & walk away. That leaves them standing there with their jaws still flapping & looking very foolish.



Now that's some good advice. My family makes fun of my path all the time. And I find that ignoring the ignorant or thanking them stumps them. they have no way to respond to it b/c they expected a debate.

[Siren]

Baptists are very very very ignorant to other's beliefs...even other christians...

The man you talked about sounds like what used to be called a "foot washing baptist"...

Anyway, let the man think what he wants, as long as YOU feel you are happy with your decisions in life (religiously or otherwise)...his intolerance and ignorance will catch up to him one day....

Bright Blessings,

Siren

[zhowlingwolf]

I'm grateful to you both, Siren and Da Witch !!!
The knowledge, caring and sharing in this Pagan Community,
is without compare !!! If I am ever able to help, you can believe I will !!! God/dess bless you both, and all !!!
Blessed Be !!! zhowlingwolf

[gunner]

your story doesn't surprise me wolf, i grew up as a baptist and people like the one you describe are all too common in their ranks. they are much of the reason i left that church long before i became pagan. there really isn't much you can do with that breed of pig-headed ignorance except ignore it as much as possible. (n.b. this does not describe all christians, nor even all baptists.) i might wonder if his loud condemnation of "witches" and other "heretics" might be a cover for sins of his own, including the "sin" of doubt. someone whos faith is strong does not need to denigrate another's beliefs to bolster his own. (e.g., our friend "eastern priest" who is certain in his faith and respects our beliefs.) the best advice i can give is to ignore him as much as possible and refuse to argue with him. you'll never budge him and only aggravate yourself to no purpose.

[bansidhe]

i sorta know how you feel zhowlingwolf, i grew up in northern ireland within a family of very strict presbyterians/protestants and i had no one to help me! (im still growing up in a family of strict presbyterians! :) ) so, im sure i can confidently say that were all here for ya! *huggles* good luck hun, if theres anything else i can do give me a shriek!
take care and brightest blessings,
bans. :bubbles:

[zhowlingwolf]

His wife/Aunt called today and told my wife that " I hope your not teaching your children about this "! Her husband/Uncle was concerned ,also If I was jamming down her throat. He wants me to call him and go to church ( LoL ).She told them that she will give me the message ! I am not calling back, and playing this game !!! Gunner maybe it is something to do with his faith, or ??? I'm going to give him the best leaving alone I know how to !!! And Bansidhe you are very kind !!!
Blessed Be !!! zhowlingwolf

[Siren]

Sorry, the evil pagan jumped out in me when i read what you said zhowlingwolf.....my first instinct was to tell you to go to church....wear your pentacle.....and say every prayer they say with "goddess" instead of "god".....*grin* ...sorry, as i said the evil pagan in me jumped out....

But yes, ignoring them is the best way to handle it....

(although the evil way is more fun)

:evilway:

Siren

[zhowlingwolf]

ROFLMAO !!! That would be grrrreeeeaaaatttt though !!!!
May the God/dess Bless you always !!!
BB !!! zhowlingwolf

[Myst]

I'm a little surprised. This man's behaviour isn't due to his religion, it's due to him being a jerk! Anyone of any religion can be rude and insensitive as well as ignorant like he was. I agree with Wildchild - your best bet may be just to laugh it off or give him thanks for his concern - no need to upset yourself over him! Obviously he's not going to listen to reason, and there's no point in worrying yourself.

[QueendeQrash]

Sounds like your having sooooooo much fun!!
Have you tried refering to WWJD (What Would Jesus Do)? That question is printed everywhere to remind people that one is suppose to emulate his teachings. What is happening to you is not to Xtain-ly. You might want to remind him of his religion. Just a thought. After all, did not Jesus talk to people of other religions without trying to convert them or condemn them? Ask him if he has ever read the Bible? I know many upon many Xtians who have not! IMPO, if he has not, then he is going off of the teachings of other person, not Jesus.
Well, those have worked for me in the past. You might want to give it a whirl. Good luck.

[kittiepoetrygod]

I agree, Myst. People that are jerks are jerks, if they happen to be of the same denomination, its not really nice to say everyone from that denomination is a jerk, is it?

I would call back, explain that you will not attend Church with him, and then let it go at that. Hang up. If he calls back, say the same thing. Then tell him to stop calling you. If he refuses, look up your local laws and see if it counts as harrasment. If he goes around shouting out that you're an evil Pagan or something, tell him that if he doesn't stop you'll have to file a report against him for repeated slander and/or libel.

Thats the smart me speaking. The dumb me would probably shout, "Away, spawn of Jesus" at him.

Whatever you choose is fine, but i wouldn't ignore him, because he'll keep coming back to haunt you, so to speak.

[Dellit Tandannon]

i think you should all ask yourselves the question WWDD?
What Would Dellit Do? :p

[Lavender]

Unfortunately, self-righteous jerks come from all walk of life, religion & paths. It's really too bad you can't pick your relatives. :rolleyes:

Some people will listen to your side and respect your right to practice religious freedom. With others, you have more luck talking to the rock in your garden. Anytime you need to scream in frustration, we're here for you, zhowlingwolf!

[zhowlingwolf]

Kittiepoetrygod and Mist I will try to apply what you are saying !!!
Since trying to ignore him doe'ntseem to be working , I'll try to explain that I wont go with him , and ask him to stop calling !!!
If this does'nt work I'll try what you said QueendeQrash; regarding WWJD/ & done. Out of curiosity what would Dellit do ???
This is definitly workable solutions !!!
If any of you ever need me, I'll be there for you !!!
" Away Jesus Spawn " ( LoL )!!!
BB !!! zhowlingwolf

[zhowlingwolf]

Wildchild you always made me feel at home !!!
I will always be here for you too !!!
May the light be your guide and the darkness be your comfort !!!
BB !!! zhowlingwolf

[flar7]

just smile and thank him for judging you and your family and move on.

[bansidhe]

im glad i didnt get to choose my rellies, i wouldnt have had anywhere near the amount of fun and disowning happening if i did. juss part of the service zhowlingwolf! :) ive gotta balance out the bitchiness sometimes. if he says youre an evil pagan, i agree, juss say thanx and do something annoying like prove to him that hell with flames doesnt exist, using the bible. thats what i do at skool, and although i still have to go to chapel and christian studies, the teachers are much more pagan friendly now. at the end of the day, you gotta live with them, so tread lightly! (like i can talk! :P)
take care and brightest blessing,
bans. :bubbles:

[Socharis]

Originally posted by zhowlingwolf
I went to my wife's cousins B-day party and her Uncle ( who is a devoted Baptist ), heard I am Pagan. He got on his soap box so that 15 or so people heard him, stating " I'm damning myself, my wife and children straight to hell ". He was saying this in front of my wife and children !!! I felt so angry and hurt from this ignorance. I had a lump in my throat. All I could say was unfortunately this attitude makes America a little less than it could be . I politely excused myself and left. I did'nt want to be a bad example to my children or a poor representive of Paganism.
Did I do the right thing ???
Blessed Be !!! zhowlingwolf

I think you handled it nicely :thumbsup:

[Keron]

If I had been you, I would have exploded and sent him into the birthday cake.

[Socharis]

Originally posted by Keron
If I had been you, I would have exploded and sent him into the birthday cake.

LOL 8O

[Keron]

Such an excess guy. Really needs a good weeding out. Freak-- pardon me, I'm kinda marked "highly-reactive" at the moment.

[Socharis]

Originally posted by Keron
Such an excess guy. Really needs a good weeding out. Freak-- pardon me, I'm kinda marked "highly-reactive" at the moment.

LMAO 8O

[zhowlingwolf]

Flar7 that is exactly what I did today !!! Hope it is sufficient,@ least for now !!! Socharis and bansidheThank you for your support !!! I've had a lot more balance today between all the imput, time to think about it, & some research.
Thank you all for helping me improve and become a more mature, spiritual person !!!
Blessed Be !!! z-wolf

[Keron]

Originally posted by zhowlingwolf
Flar7 that is exactly what I did today !!! Hope it is sufficient,@ least for now !!! Socharis and bansidheThank you for your support !!! I've had a lot more balance today between all the imput, time to think about it, & some research.
Thank you all for helping me improve and become a more mature, spiritual person !!!
Blessed Be !!! z-wolf

Good for ya!

[emraldshadowcat]

I know how you feel! My boyfriend's parents think that I'm evil! He's a christian too, but he accepts me for who I am and finds that it's really respectable that I do my own thing. But we have to sneak around to hang out with each other because his parents don't want him to have anything to do with me.
One night I went to church with him and they tried to "exercise my demons". they kept yelling stuff like rebuke the powers of darkness! It was really scary! I still have nightmares about all those people around me! It was like being attacked by an fanatic mob of christians!

[LadyWinter]

I wonder if it hurts to be that closed minded...Oh well I know how you feel....my in laws recently discovered my husband was pagan and now of course it is "all that evil witches fault" ( I have thought about correcting them and saying no I am an evil Druid but I think it would be lost on them)

I dont see the inlaws much now because of this and neither does the hubby.....Course what they dont know is that he became Wiccan and got me interested in Paganism...So technically he is the "Evil Witch". 8O 8O

My opinion..stay away from them as much as possible and live your life how you see fit. Seems to me from what you have said you are doing a fine job.

Slan Astar
LadyWinter
(Evilcus Druidcus Extraordinarecus)

[Keron]

:mad: I distinctly remember seeing a spell somewhere that was entitled "Get-out-of-my-face-you-evil-theologian-spell"... better go sniff it out again.

[bansidhe]

lmao keron.....:rotfl:
share it when you find it, please ! :)

hows it going with them z-wolf?

take care and brightest blessings,
bans. :bubbles:

[bansidhe]

and i got told today that i am a blemish on the face of humanity. *shrug* another compliment to add to my repetoire.

take care and brightest blessings,
bans. :bubbles:

[zhowlingwolf]

Hi and Blessings emraldshadowcat !!! I'm sorry to hear you have to sneak around , that must be a difficult strain on you !!! With your permission I'd like to light a candle for you, and send energies out to you for your happiness !!! Thank you for your encouragement Lady Winter. I see that your in a simular position,
and your handling it very well too !!! I am only to aware that her relatives believe I'm corrupting her, and her beliefs. At least I know in my heart that I love her, stand beside her, and give her
the room to be whoever she chooses. I only know this, cause she tells me that she is grateful for the way I've treated her for the last 11 years of marriage !!! Hang in there, if you have one-another that's a lot !!!
Keron if there is a spell of protection it would sure help a lot of people !!!
Bansidhe, I wrote her uncle a letter. I shared with him I have only the best intent for his niece. That I respect his right to choose and believe as he sees fit. Also that I hope he attains all the happiness and joys this world has to offer. Now the ball is in his court, and I'll see how he responds. You have shared a lot with me recently, and in a time when I needed support ; I have felt that from you !!!I think you're GGGRRREEEAAATTT !!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Keron]

Originally posted by bansidhe
and i got told today that i am a blemish on the face of humanity. *shrug* another compliment to add to my repetoire.


If it's another close-faced idiot who thinks "pagans and heathens cause the world evil"... :mad: if you're a blemish, that guy's a huge pimple.

[bansidhe]

hehehe, tankies keron...apparently im corrupting the christian ethos by being present, and the sooner i leave (5 weeks to go) the better! :)

and honest z-wolf, if i can ever help / give support, just give me a shriek!!!
i think thats probly one of the best ways to do it. by writing it all out, youve got the opportunities to choose your words more carefully. im biased, thats the way i broke it to most of my family! :)
hang in there hun!!! tell me when he gets the letter! :) and youre GRRRRRRREAAATTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!! as well!!! *huggles*

take care and brightest blessings,
bans. :bubbles:

[Methanespirit]

Z-wolf, none of the actions that I've seen mentioned from these so-called Christians is representative of the faith nor of discipleship in Christ Jesus. What all of you are experiencing with these false believers is typical of RELIGIONISTS, and they have been the scourge of the Church since there was a Church nearly 2000 years ago. Do not believe that you are the only ones who have to endure such persecution. They condemn (and sometimes kill) their own kind, even those who follow Jesus in the Holy Spirit, because they do not know the resurrected Christ nor the Father. All they are familiar with is the dogma and religious traditions contained in their religion, which is not from God nor the Scriptures. I'm sorry that all of you have endured this kind of insults by those who claim to be followers of Christ. No where in the Biblical accounts of Jesus' teachings did he ever revile anyone for their beliefs. What he did condemn, was the religious leaders of His time( and for all times) You can read about this in Matt. chapter 23. Religious leaders do not have the Spirit of the faith, but instead condemn everybody who doesn't do as they like to SEE,(which is a faithlessness) and what they do is called "legalism" because they think they are doing God a service, that they are "earning brownie points" from God! And by turning off others from the faith they are actually the enemies of Him who they think they are representing.

[Demeter]

Originally posted by Methanespirit
Religious leaders do not have the Spirit of the faith, but instead condemn everybody who doesn't do as they like to SEE,(which is a faithlessness) and what they do is called "legalism" because they think they are doing God a service, that they are "earning brownie points" from God! And by turning off others from the faith they are actually the enemies of Him who they think they are representing.

I ran into one of these on a different BB a few months ago. The board was related to dieting, but it had a regular Christian thread and we pagans thought it would be neat to have one of our own. Well, this apparently inflamed certain of the Christian types and we wound up with an altar call prayer plonked into the middle of our thread, and then all Heck broke loose. Somewhere in the middle of this, I wound up posting IN the Christian thread, trying to counsel the offending person on how to witness more effectively, without turning her audience against her .... It was a very weird experience. It wound up to everyone's benefit, though, because the Christians and the Pagans have been managing to get along fairly well since then.

[StormCloud]

Demeter - :) I remember that one well! Glad to see you found this place -

(aka RedBFJ)

zhowl, being witnessed to is a very difficult thing. Especially when it's family - it's much harder to get away from it. I try to just say 'thank you for caring' and leave it at that. You can never talk 'to' them - they've already made up their minds. I feel for you...

[zhowlingwolf]

Thank you for caring and sharing Methanespirit, Demeter, and not least, StormCloud !!! I must say this is by far the best site and people I have ever been privlaged to speak with !!! I will always do my best to uphold the Wiccan Rede, and be the best example of Paganism that I can be !!!
Blessed Be !!! z-wolf

[Methanespirit]

To the average Christian mind, anyone who claims to be wiccan or into witchcraft, is automatically branded as one of the "worst evil-doers" on the earth. I'm not sure where all of this started but it has caused problems between the two factions for many centuries, and it is so unnecessary. Personally I hold the church community (note, I did not say Christian) resonsible for the offences. That all people on the earth, past, present, and future all fall short of God's standards of righteousness (according to Christian theology). This also includes them! But somehow, they think that they are better than the average cut of person. This same attitude is found in every religious movement, some worse than others. And among the Christian community, it is self-defeating because of the self-righteousness that prevails. It is unfortunate that the stigma of "witch" carries so much animosity with the average church member. I personally do not know to handle this one, it is beyond my comprehension. Years ago, I used to be in the Occult, when ever I visited a Christian, I didn't reveal my beliefs and we got along together just fine. Perhaps it is that I didn't say anything in derision or trying to be contemptuous against them.