I Cant Take This Anymore!!!!!!!!!!

[Aconite]

I feel like im gonna friggen explode. Tonight this girl im trying to help get through depresseions like, best friend killed herself. So shes SOO upset, my bestfriend found out theres a good chance shes going to victoria which is 15 hours plus an hour and a half ferry ride away from me. Her brother Taylor broke his arm and has to go to a hospital two hours away to get surgery. Tiffany herself has a fever at 103.2 that WONT go down and shes sick. She feels like crap becuase of it. This guy I like lives like so far away and is moving a bit closer, but still is really far away and i can tell he likes me to. And I dont even want a boyfriend. I had to climb a mountain tday(6.5 STEEP kilimeters to the top, 13 all together) and my knees are KILLING me. I have to work for 7 hours tomorrow, meaning standing for 7 hours straight. I feel like crying my eyes out, but can't cry. And I jsut wanna go find Tiffany, take her pain away, go find Annie, take her pain away, And go back in time to a day when I was at Tiffanys house, and we were laughing and having the best time, both happy and greatful for life, and pause time. BUT NO! I can't.I just wanna get up and go. Anywhere but here. I jsut, can't stand it. I feel like im gonna die. I have so muhc pressure on me. I love Tiffany so much that the thought of her being so far away jsut about kills me, becuase shes my best friend and the one i trust the most in my life. Ive never had a friend like her and Im afriad to loose her. I jsut feel dead. Like I feel soo horrible right now I dont even know what else to type.

I'm:

-scared
-nervouse
-hot
-can't breath easly
-in pain(mental and physical)
- tired
-upset
- on teh verge of crying but cant
- upset
- anxiouse
- All around Blah


Im not looking for sympathy or support, I jsut had to say somethign.. I cant.. I dont know..

[BlueMoon13]

You're 13 and you have to work for 7 hours tomorrow?!? Does'nt sound right :lookaroun . Perhaps you should call in sick. I think with all thats going on tonight it's justified. Mkae yourself a cup of chamomile tea, and save the bag. Soak in the bathtub, with some salt mixed in, tip your head back and let the teabag rest on your eyes. That will soothe them you must have been crying some tonight. Cucumber slices will help,too. If you have any rose or strawberry scented oils, dab a little on the back of your neck, then on each wrist then run your wrists down your hair, picturing all your troubles shaking off you like a loose dress. (Vanilla extract will work too). Then go to bed......there's nothing you can do about your all your troubles tonight, and you cannot help your friends if you are literally sick with worry yourself. _pounce_

[Aconite]

Its not that bad. I have a headache, im tired, but ive calmed down a lot. :needcoffe
I cryed yes, but i'm ok now. I'm really ok. I think. I don't know anymore. I can't call in sick becuase its my 3rd day at work lol. And I want to go to work anyways. Its just that, I really want to go see Tiffany. Shes sick, her brothers in teh hospital geting surgery, her ex boyfriend and her are TOTALLY falling back in love (its obvouse) and shes got a lot going on and I jsut wanna be there for her more than anythign in the world. Shes got way too much crap to deal with I jsut want to help her. And spend all the time I can with her.

I'll be ok, I know that, it's just, its hard sometimes, for me to.. deal with it all. Before I met Tiffany, i would have been HAPPY to trade in my life to be a rock, now i wouldnt trade it in for anyhting, becuase i have hte best best friend ever, and all I want is to help her, help take away her pain and see her happy, the way she deserves to be, why is that so hard?
Is it so much to ask, that my best friend be happy? before her I had no life, i was alone, depressed and in pain. Now I know how to smile, I know what it feels like to laugh, and sleep, why is it so much for her to be happy? I hate it.

And she has to leave. I hate that she has to leave. Im so afraid to go back to teh person I was... soo afraid.. I sut dont know anymore. All I know is "Never Give Up"

I jsut want, happiness, friendship... i dont know. Well see waht happens

[BlackMagicalCat]

Bless your heart,you are carring a heavy load for a 13 year old,Please take care of yourself as well so you will be able to help others.May the Lord help you carry your heavy ld.

[Aconite]

Thankyou:)

[BlueMoon13]

i would have been HAPPY to trade in my life to be a rock..........
You think it's easy being a rock? Someone could come along and skip you across a pond,a boyscout troop could bang you against another rock to start a fire to get some merit badge, or some little kid might come by, put you in his pocket and forget, then you'd get washed,dried, and should you survive THAT, dare I say...ironed! :yikes:
There now,got you to smile :nyah: :rubhead:

[BlackMagicalCat]

You are welcome little one,there are a lot of people here willing to talk to you if you ever need to talk,Im one of them and there are a qazillion others,you are carring a heavy load and I will keep you in my prayers

[Aconite]

thankyou, it is greatly appreciated.*hugs*

[Aconite]

You think it's easy being a rock? Someone could come along and skip you across a pond,a boyscout troop could bang you against another rock to start a fire to get some merit badge, or some little kid might come by, put you in his pocket and forget, then you'd get washed,dried, and should you survive THAT, dare I say...ironed! :yikes:
There now,got you to smile :nyah: :rubhead:


Thanks for that lol:D did make me smile