Please

[Spera]

If anyone feels drawn to give me a reading I'd sincerely appreciate it. I'm completely lost. Most noticeable in the Career arena though I have annoying baggage and realtionship issues as well. Any help would be appreciated if you have the time.

[Rhianna813]

Hi Spera (ENFP!!)

I can do a reading or 2 for ya. Do you want to keep posting here or through PM?

Rhianna

[Spera]

Here or PM's are good- whatever is best for you.

[Rhianna813]

Ok here is fine, since we already here :-) If you could elaborate on each topic with a specific question or details. This can help me use the perfect card layout. I have one that is good for somene in a relationship or there might be another one that is good for assessing your relationship "issues". Ya know? Same goes for career.

Rhianna

[Spera]

Hee hee-- I have to qulams with divesting a bunch of personal information :)

1. Career- I just graduate college with a dual major in classics (Latin and Greek language and history) and English (Creative Writing concentration) I didn't get into graduate school. So now I'm living at home wondering what to do. I randomly applied to my churched seminary- but my church doesn't pay people so it doesn't make alot of sense- I'm still interested in grad school but I don't know what steps to take I have no money and I ahve to start paying my parents rent and I don't know that I know anything well enuogh to get paid to do it. I feel very lost. I ahve very different loves- spirituality- writing- folklore- latin I just don't know what path to choose or what to do next. I wish I knew what the creator wanted of me- what path I was meant for.

2. Relationships... Well I just stepped away froma relationship because I'm all emotionally crazy right now. I was raped and stalked by a boyfriend in high school and I can't seem to get past all the surrounding trauma in myself that was created around that. I noly can let people in so far before I just shut the door on them and I don't know how to stop I'm just so afraid of being hurt and beig unable to save myself. No matter how good the person. I feel like I know nothing and at the same time I am afraid to know anything about making a real relationhip that works- everything feels like it's opening a wound and I don't know how to know when that means it's just not right or if bit's just soemthing I have to bear through...

[Rhianna813]

Definitely sounds like an intense time for you. I will be able to do your readings today and post them here.

Rhianna

[Spera]

Thank you.

[Rhianna813]

Reading for your relationship question. I used a new spread called Love's Path with the Robin Wood tarot deck.

1) How you love yourself: 2 of Swords
Your relationship with yourself is sometimes a love/hate one. While you quest to see the truth in your feelings and choices at the same time you knowingly blindfold yourself to the answers. You can be very critical of yourself and find that you must seek a "truce" between your mind and heart.

2) How you love others: 6 of Wands
When you love someone you really express it. You make them the center of attention, put them on a pedastool, and treat them like royalty. You attempt to be diplomatic with them and perhaps avoid arguments and fighting.

3) What maybe blocking the flow of love: The Moon
Something haunts you and makes your path very difficult to see. You maybe having intense dreams or visions and perhaps feelings of depression. Fear of losing control, past issues, and unsettling experiences block you on a deep level.

4) What can help you invite love into your life: Queen of Swords
This could mean someone of these traits or these traits in you. She is highly intelligent, communicative, quick thinking, and creative. Her emotions are very much in her control and seeking the truth in all things is her passion. She is one to seek counsel with and could very well be a counselor.

5) What may serve to keep you on the path of love: 4 of Cups
Time for a re-evalution as you maybe choosing the same scenarios, partners, and circumstances over and over. Disatisfaction has set in and it’s time for a change. In fact something new could very well be right in plain sight but you are too discouraged to see it.

Overview: your ability to love others is grand and you are very loving. But it’s clear your painful past is at the root of the issue here. It’s probably interfering with your ability to love and trust yourself, which causes you to doubt your ability to love and trust others.

You need move away from the relationship ideas and experiences you are having now and completely reinvent them. I believe a very smart, capable, and mature woman maybe available to help you through this.

I hope you find some insight in this reading!

Rhianna

[Spera]

Wow. You're good. I wish I knew this Queen of Swords... *laughs*

[Rhianna813]

Reading regarding your schooling, career, and job situation. I used the Celtic Cross spread with the Robin Wood deck.

Current Situation: 4 of Wands
Currently you are in a good spot. You have created a great foundation by graduating college and working hard to do so! You have a roof over your head and caring people around you.

Crosses or Supports: Hanged Man
BUT inside you are at a huge cross roads and feeling totally stuck! This card calls for you to be flexible, to adapt to what life is offering you. To make a sacrifice of what you might hold dear but is often ego based in order to gain greater (perhaps destiny related) gifts and personal advancements. A card of rebirth.

Foundation of Issue: Queen of Cups
Your confusion about what to do next is very much rooted in your emotions. You had grown accustomed to following your heart and not really questioning it. But now the harsh reality of life has butted in and your emotions are running high.

Conscious view of Issue: 8 of Wands
You are feeling like things are moving sorta fast and in some ways this excites you because you are ready for something new. But it’s easy to feel a lack of control when things are moving at light speed. You absolutely do not want to be pressured by others to “make a quick decision”.

Past: Wheel of Fortune
Your schooling and pursuits could be apart of a greater destiny for you. It was perhaps a fun and relatively easy time. Recognize your fortune for the experience but be prepared to move forward.

Near Future: 9 of Pentacles
This card shows a lot of financial comfort, independence, and happiness but only by relying on yourself! This maybe the call to roll up your sleeves and get to work. IE: work with a paycheck.

You in the reading: King of Cups
While the Queen of Cups has been an undercurrent in your situation – the King is a call for you to master your feelings. You may really need to get them focused and reined in and not let them lead the show. This will greatly help you see your best path.

Environment: Death
Great change IS around you and this card indicates it’s time has come. Old patterns, beliefs, circumstances will be changing around you and you may need to keep up.

Hopes and Fears: High Priestess
Fear of the unknown, the hidden, secrets, and mystery make you weary. You are looking for something concrete and physical to lean on. Learning to accept and embrace ambiguity could help you get through this time.

Outcome: 8 of Swords
This is a tough card and that means self bondage. You may continue to feel trapped and uncertain about your future. But the ties that bind you are very loose and you completely have the power to free yourself.

Extra card: How can she avoid the 8 of Swords: 4 of Pentacles
This card challenges you to stop being greedy with what you hold so dear. Giving up some of it will open many doors for you and bring more emotional satisfaction.

Overview: You are certainly at a crossroads and you are feeling stuck in indecision. School was an emotionally rewarding experience and you miss it on many levels. Especially how it fed your heart. Now you are mourning that feeling and your emotions are on a roll coaster ride. This is not serving you well and you need to get them in control again.

You need to be open to change and (temporarily) setting aside some goals in order to see a new goal that is needed now. The more you cling to a set belief of what makes you happy the more you may cut yourself off from something new and far more gratifying. Moving past your fear of the unknown will actually help you trust your instincts.

Although you should not give in to pressure others are throwing at you, you do need to step up be as independent and responsible as you can be. I think you may see a reward if you do!\

Good luck Spera!! I hope you enjoyed your readngs and please offer any feedback if you have some. I wish the best for you :-)

Rhianna

[Spera]

I apologize that I didn't see the last reading until now. ANd after two years I ahve still had a hard time letting go of my despair of not being in college anymore. I think I did find the queen of swords in myself and very soon after this reading I met the man I married. And we both moved three times to be with each other and since I met him there has been nothing but change-- including actual deaths in my family- and the car I totaled. I didn't manage to avoid the self bondage and am still looking for a way out of that in regards to my future. These fears of the unknown can be quite paralyzing.