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Thread: Happier now than as a Theist?

  1. #11
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    I feel like saying that I'm far less happy as a non-theist, but I guess the better answer is that, yes, I am conflicted.

    As a young kid in Bible study camp, I was sort of miserable. I didn't believe in that God, and I was under the impression (moreso, I was GIVEN the impression) that it was wrong, and I spent a lot of time being afraid of Hell because I just couldn't make myself believe.

    In my teens, I first found Wicca and began to believe in the goddess, and I think that was the happiest I've ever been in my life. It fell away over the years, for a variety of reasons, and I've considered myself an atheist for about five years or so.

    I do feel a bit of a pull towards theism now and again, but I feel the same now as I did as a kid. Not so much the fear, as I have absolutely no believe in Judgement or the afterlife, but I just *can't* believe in a deity. It feels illogical or silly to me. I think the pull is more towards the feeling I had as a teen, not so much the idea of theism itself.

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    BC, Canada
    I posted a blog about this once, and yes, I am very much happier and I feel more free without a god or goddess.

    I once read this "inspirational" book. It was the sob stories of people who had escaped abusive homes, drug addiction, poverty, depression, tragedy.

    I was sexually and verbally abused as a child. I ran away from home and dropped out of school. I lived on the streets of Vancouver's infamous East Side for 2.5 years, addicted to pills and selling pot. I endured a couple of abusive relationships. I lost my infant daughter to a genetic defect. Her father almost killed me a couple of years later when I broke up with him and he found out I was dating someone else. I recently lost an aunt to a disease that stretched out her dying over a decade. I lost my little brother to a senseless suicide.

    But I also have a wonderful partner, we have a beautiful child together. We have a great many good friends. We own a home, both have decent jobs, make ok money, and have a relatively happy and stress free life together.
    Now in this book I was reading, this is the part where they always say they found Jesus or God or some other deity, and thier lives came together. It always strikes me as odd, because letting go of theistic beliefs and realizing that I was the only thing in control of my destiny is what "saved" me. For a long time I believed in "god". And how I hated him. I would go to sunday school and church and pray every night and still be forced to perform sexual acts with the family member that molested me every time we went to that house. "He" didn't stop someone from calling me names, telling me I was useless and wearing my self-esteem paper thin. My prayers and faith didn't give me the strength to walk away from my addictions. No higher power intervened on my suffering daughter's behalf, despite days spent in churches, praying for her life to improve or end. No Being was watching over me when my ex tried to strangle me on that deserted highway. No "loving" god would have allowed my aunt and her family to suffer for so long as they did. god did not stay my brother's hand when he decided that living was not an option anymore.

    I told on the molester and he stayed away from me.I decided that another's opinion of my brains, beauty or future didn't mean that I had to live it. I had a near OD and it scared me into quitting the pills. My daughter and my aunt died after several months of pain and hospitals, and when someone would stupidly say to me "Well, God had a plan" I wanted to scream that that god must have been some kind of sadistic asshole (and I did once, but she drove me to it) to have a plan to torture an innocent person for such a long time. I kicked my ex in the balls and beat him off on that lonely road. I am finding my way to a peaceful closure of my brother's death. Ichoose not to let the shit in my life keep me from living and loving. And what has helped me get here is realizing there isn't a Being that you can cajole into "fixing" things. I feel a great deal of pity for those lost people, praying and praying, but changing nothing themselves, waiting endlessly for a "miracle" when most times a different outlook or a major change is the only "miracle" required.

    Hell is right here on earth. And the only one that can save you from it is YOU.

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    I remember it like it was yesterday the day I stopped believing in god any sort of supernatural superstitions. It was like a weight was lifted off my shoulders.It was like now finally I can be the real me and not filter myself by what the bible says I'm suppose to do or act or whatever.
    And I'm much happier.

  4. #14
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Georgia mountians
    Good question.

    As a person yes I do feel happier because I feel more free. My thoughts are my own and not dictated by any dogmatic belief in some framework that I have to work within. The process was somewhat painful and the thought of going to hell stuck with me in the back of my mind for years.

    I always feel a pull back to religion but now that I understand why I do it doesn't bother me. It's very comforting to study religions now because I have a better understanding of why our brains are wired to find that meaning.

    Atheism has been the most liberating aspect part of my life, however I do miss one aspect of religion.

    I did like the fact that it gave me a sense of community. To be able to go to church and socialize with many like minded people and make friends easier from it, it has it's way of bonding people together and giving a sense of community.

    However with the internet and telecommunications many atheist communities are forming and organizing which ive recently become a part of and that sense of community and bonding that I felt in from church is slowly coming back in a much more liberating "free thought" type of way instead of limited to a certian structure of dogma.

  5. #15
    Join Date
    May 2010
    having never been a theist, i have no basis for that specific comparison.

    however, i am happier now that i've expanded my spirituality from hard agnostic (and i mean very hard agnostic, no innuendo intended) to agnostic paganism. i've always felt a strong connection with the earth, the wheel of the year, the elements, and so on, but i avoided exploring it for a long time because i didn't think it could coexist with my hard agnosticism. i've since learned that i can honor and pursue that connection while still questioning its logic, and that combination makes me happier and lets me grow than any other belief system i've experienced.

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