Also OMM I'm trying to puzzle out this conversation from last night:
Him (in this over the top fake English Accent trying to sound all lecherous): Ello Darling, how's your apples and pears?
Me (distracted tone): Apples and Pears? I'm not familiar with that expression, what's sexual about that? Maybe it's an English expression.
Him: It's Cockney.
Me (thinking dugh, but that's in England): and that is where [trying to point out that being Cockney does't make it not English.]
Him: A part of England
Me: And they speak Bulgarian there or something?
Him: No, they speak English
Me: So, it's not and English expression why...?
Him: Because it's Cockney. Pears = Stairs.
Me: So what you were asking about was "hows your apples and stairs...?"
Me (confused): Like a staircase?
Me (fascinated and curious tone): And that's normal over there. To inquire about the health and well being of people stairways?
Him (annoyed): Yes. But I didn't say it right. Pears Stairs.
Me (doubtful): Really. People go up to each other and ask how's your pears and they are really asking how's your stairs? About their staircases in their house?
Him: This is where you get all whiney and all like 'I don't get it' when I already told you I SAID IT WRONG!
*end of conversation*
So I'm sitting here thinking of upper crust people meeting each other on the street asking about each others stairs. I mean what's the response? "Oh the stairs are being very well behaved this week - haven't tripped anyone!" Or: "the stairs are a little slippery what with the new polish."