November 11th, 2010, 01:25 AM
Hi, I'm new to MW, and I'm not very sure if this is the forum to post this question. I'm looking for suggestions about a ritual of atonement.
The quick facts: as a pagan, I felt a strong affinity for Freyja, for very personal reasons, but I eventually discovered that she didn't want to be my patron goddess. I realized that in rather dire circumstances, and my breaking with her was quite sacrilegous. Really disgraceful. To this day I have not felt clean enough to enter her shrine again, nor to pray to other gods, save Loki, who is rather understanding in matters of sacrilege.
To my surprise, and also to my amusement, I experienced the full extent of Freyja's power just after we broke: I lost the keys of my house when returning from her shrine, a week later I left my car in a bad parking lot and it was taken away (when returning from a holiday, so I had to walk miles on foot to retrieve it, at night and with my luggage), then a week later my car broke down and is now being repaired. I've been fortunate enough to take it all with good humor.
If I want to go on with my rituals and life, I have to atone to Freyja. Besides, I still love and respect her, and I'm ashamed of myself. What ritual do you suggest? I know it must be a blood ritual (my blood), but I would accept any further suggestions, if you are kind enough to offer any.
Thank you very much, and please excuse the long post. At least I hope you find it instructive. And remember, never, never enter a shrine while drunk and bitter.
Last edited by wyrg; November 11th, 2010 at 01:28 AM.
November 12th, 2010, 11:26 AM
Like any apology, it mainly requires the courage to do it.
Originally Posted by wyrg
Set up a sacrifice for Freya. Make sure you have plenty of proper offerings. Is a whole bottle of mead and a loaf of sweet bread enough? If not, get more, and give it. Drink none yourself unless it is a toast to her.
Write what you mean to say in your best words, and say it with a whole heart. In my opinions the Gods no longer want our blood, but if you must prick your thumbs or whatever, do so carefully and well.
Have your runes handy, and use them to ask whether Freya has accepted your offerings. If the answer is no, ask what you must do. Do not let your shame rule your reading of the signs.
Freya is not a harsh goddess, in my experience. Go to her with an open heart and full hands, and make a good offering.
November 13th, 2010, 11:43 AM
I feel you are right about the blood, it somehow seems too hasty and too easy (even if I was thinking something more serious than a scratch in a thumb).
I will try a generous offering, as you suggest, and then I'll swear not to drink a drop of alcohol for a month (not as penitence as a christian would do, but to show Freyja that I'm really serious-- I love having a beer with my friends after work). I agree this is much more gentle and compromising than letting my blood run, which I could do anyway if this doesn't work.
I have found your counsel wise and useful, Ian. Thank you very much.