Recurring dreams and new strange ones too

[JustAnotherDood]

Okay, so here goes...

In my dream, I'm totally snooping around this girls house (I'm guessing it's a house), looking for something. I have no idea what I'm looking for, but apparently she's actually home. So I freak out, and try to leave her home. I must've made a noise, and she became cognizant that I was there, and so she gives chase. It becomes insanely difficult to get away from this girl... I ran through what is now an apartment complex (and it's night time) and she pursues. I jump off of a ledge onto a carport roof, and from the carport roof I jump down to the concrete. She uses stairs I didn't know about, and isn't delayed much in her chase. I keep running. Another ledge, only this time there is a community pond thing below. So I jump in and swim to the other side. She runs around the pond thing, and still gives chase. I simply cannot escape her.

Allow me to illuminate a few things now.
I am not a creeper! I've never broken into a home, or snooped around a girls home looking for stuff. I'm very awkward in places I'm unfamiliar with, watching and listening and trying to feel comfortable. So that part of the dream is as weird to me as the dream itself.

I know this girl. Though I won't reveal her name for privacy reasons, I've known of, and loved her for some time (5, 6 years?) But she's always been in relationships, and, I've only recently voiced my interests in her. She is polyamorous, and I have a very hard time with one of her 'primary' boyfriends, so I won't pursue her. Though monogamy fails me time and time and time and time again, I dunno if polyamory is any better for someone like me, so I'm simply abstaining from all forms of relationships right now. I obviously just need some 'me' time and to clear my head and figure some things out.

Finally, my life is very topsy-turvy this year. My 5 year relationship came to an end and I am in the processes of splitting up with her and moving out (not the girl in my dreams). I just got my own vehicle and it is now paid off, and my next step is to find my own apartment, which is spendy in WA, so spendy I've had to get a 2nd job just to afford all of this.

I have sleep apnea. I have restless leg syndrome. I prefer to 'chill' myself out (physically getting cold) to curl up into one smallish blanket and that is how I like to fall asleep. Years of research has taught me recurring dreams happen for people with sleep apnea. And RLS (restless leg syndrome). And cold environments produces dreams as well. And by dreams, I mean nightmares. I never really have good dreams. I'm dying, or running from something or someone, or I'm stuck in a haunted McMansion that I must endure nightmare after nightmare, floor by floor before something really messed up happens and I jolt awake, sometimes in a cold sweat.

My (now) Ex girlfriend and I couldn't tolerate each others sleep behaviours, so we sleep in separate rooms, and then a month or so after that is when I broke up with her.

I know this is a lot. I had to share this though. I have anywhere from one up to three bad dream/nightmares a night, and it totally messes with my sleep, and energy levels. Sometimes though, the dreams really 'haunt' me and stay in my mind, clear, like the night I had them, whereas most fade away like B Grade movies. This is one of those dreams. So any insights you wise people have, or thoughts on my dream aforementioned would be greatly appreciated, as, I am not the person in my dream, and, the whole dream seems so... Off-kilter and out of place...

Thanks to you all for your time and patience with this post. Good night, and, sweet dreams

[Cassie]

I think you have more or less answered your own questions in your own description and analysis of your dream. You are sexually and emotionally interested in this girl although her lifestyle is quite different to your own. You are kind of scared that she will recognise your interest, not out of rear of rejection but quite the opposite... You worry that she may well be interested in you as well, but what does that mean from her point of view? You are scared of getting sucked in to her polyamorous world and lifestyle; about how her primary lover will react and how you would react to him/her, you are anxious about how you would cope emotionally etc...
But actually you want her to catch you. You want her to jump in that pool with you.

Does that help or make sense?

[JustAnotherDood]

I suppose, to a degree, that it does... Unfortunately, I will not be able to make amends with her 'primary' boyfriend, due to some drama he instigated (between him and her, nothing to do with me), and my inability to tolerate said knucklehead. I'm new to interpreting dreams, so sometimes if it seems obvious, I question if that could actually be the answer. I appreciate your input! It does make sense, from that perspective... It is difficult to step out of 'my' perspective in dreams sometimes... Thank you again, Miss Cassie... MUCH appreciated!!

[DreamaLittle]

Have you asked a doctor or a shrink for help with the nightmares? And if all the nightmares are related in some way to your real life......it's time to make some changes.

Her personal bs is hers alone. It is unfortunate that you know about it. Now is it possible to see her without seeing said knucklehead? Worth it? Only you know if that is even a possibility. Maybe just kick back and wait for knucklehead to disappear. People do break up.

[JustAnotherDood]

As far as doctors/shrinks go, I have two jobs (80+ hours a week now :/) so I don't have much time to deal with all of them... Not to mention, with shrinks, it takes several, lengthy, and expensive sessions to get to the root of the problems... So I feel this is something I can address simply by becoming a better, more independent person... I just got my vehicle bought and paid for last friday, and already fixed the 3 major complaints the previous owners had with it, so with luck, it will be a solid work vehicle for at least a couple of years...

Her personal B.S. was hers alone, but I was kind of her 'vent' friend, so she shared it all with me, and now I can't un-know what I've learned about the knucklehead, and, if I were a lesser person.... grumble grumble... But I won't impact her life in a negative way, and I want absolutely nothing to do with the jerk she's oh so infatuated with... for reasons beyond my comprehension...

There was a negative moment when her and I were at a wedding of mutual friends and she was my 'date' so to speak, but that ended up terrible as well... She was flirting with all the guys while hanging onto my arm, and I didn't react well so I drank a bit too much wedding libations (subsequently the last time I've had a drop was that wedding :/) so down went the poor mans truth serum and out came the 'tell me the truth about everything, JustAnotherDood' from her, and I told her I didn't wanna get into it, but she pushed and pushed, so I ranted back (for the first time) telling her exactly how I feel about her (in)significant other, and my feelings about him, and she didn't take well to that, so after some next day 'sobered up' drama slash apologies, I basically cut the cord between us... She didn't need me in her life at that time, and as long as he was in hers (knowing what she shared with me that I can't un-know really jaded my views of the already questionable male) I didn't want to be in hers...

Whew... RANT... my apologies... I guess I just needed to get this out of my system... I understand what needs to be done, I understand what I'm not to do, and I understand that the changes within me that I am making will end me up a better human, overall... So good begets good, and vice versa, and I don't believe she could have brought good into my life... She viewed me as just a potential sexual partner to add to her collection, and I didn't feel that way about her, I'm a hopeless broken romantic, so sex is fun and fine and dandy, but without substance to back it, I'm just not interested...

Thanks for letting me rant. And for helping me understand this dream a bit more... Analyzing it with others is far more productive than dwelling on it alone, so I valued and appreciated your time. Thanks, very much!!